The holidays can make even the strongest of us nostalgic — snow, lights, and the pressure to be “merry” sometimes opens the door for an ex to pop back into your messages.

That “Merry Christmas” text might look innocent, but for many, it’s a sneaky tactic to test the waters.

Manipulative people LOVE using emotionally driven moments (like holidays) to weasel their way back in.

Here’s how to protect your heart and your peace this season.

1. Pause before you even consider responding

Impulse reactions often lead to regret. Take a breath and evaluate your motives. Are you tempted to reply out of loneliness or nostalgia, or is there a genuine need to reconnect?

2. Keep your boundaries firm

If your relationship ended for good reasons, remember them. A polite acknowledgment like “Thanks, wishing you well” is sufficient — anything beyond that may reopen old wounds. Or maybe, don’t even write back.

3. Don’t engage in emotional games

Exes sometimes reach out during the holidays to stir jealousy or gauge your current relationship status. Stay grounded. Respond from a place of self-respect, not curiosity or ego. Or maybe don’t respond at all.

4. Redirect your energy

Instead of replaying old memories, focus on current connections. Spend time with friends, family, or your partner. Engage in a hobby or festive activity that makes you feel joyful and whole.

5. DND anyone? Protect your mental space

Mute notifications if necessary. Press that Do Not Disturb button if you have to. Avoid scrolling through their social media while sipping eggnog by the fire. Peace of mind is the ultimate gift to yourself.

This Christmas, remember: a text doesn’t define your worth or happiness. Guard your heart, honor your boundaries, and let the season be about joy, not old drama.