Your relationship is over now. It’s not “slightly” over in a way that leaves the door open for reconciliation someday.

This isn’t the time to jump into an on-and-off, hot-and-cold arrangement. You’re reading this because you know full well that you and your ex are both DONE. 

So… what do you do first? The best advice would be to go completely ghost from your ex. In other words, it’s time to go no contact.

Ghosting your ex is a MUST

If your ex wants you back, they might conjure up the perfect thing to say to weasel back into your life. The relationship ended for a reason.

Were they toxic? Were they way too sarcastic all the time? Were they unable to commit to you fully? Whatever the reason might be, you have to stay strong and hold your ground.

Lonely nights might come along, but that doesn’t mean you should welcome your ex back into your life. Boring nights will come along every once in a while also. Still, going ghost from your ex is the smartest thing you can do.

If you’re an avid social media user, going ghost from your usual consistent posting is another brilliant healing tactic.

The worst mistake you can make would be to flood your social media accounts with heartbreak songs, cryptic quotes, and emotional messages. And for the love of all that is holy, please do not post a video of yourself crying. 

Don’t publicly post sad or cryptic content

Posting sad things all over social media looks like a desperate cry for attention and pity. You can always reach out to the people you’re closest with to vent and discuss your feelings in private settings.

Distant friends, random followers, and complete strangers on the internet don’t deserve access to your innermost emotions. 

Keep in mind that there are haters out there keeping an eye on your accounts at all times. They’re praying for your downfall as we speak. Don’t give them the ammunition. 

If you post a crying video or an emo quote, it WILL be screenshotted. It WILL be shared in a group chat filled with people who are laughing at you. 

You probably don’t need your ex to know you care as much as you do anyway. By going ghost, you might want to keep your posts to a minimum for a short period of time… at the very least. 

If you overdo it by posting hundreds of “happy-go-lucky” selfies, it looks like you’re trying way too hard to pretend you don’t care.

You don’t have to stop posting altogether, but keep it cute and natural. If you go out with your friends and you’re feeling good about your look for the night, there’s nothing wrong with posting a few pics or videos. 

The issue arises when you flood your social media profiles with forced content of cheerful moments that simply don’t look authentic. 

Don’t completely isolate yourself

Going ghost after a breakup can look different for everyone. For some people, it means disappearing from social media for a few weeks. For others, it means ghosting your ex while staying socially involved with friends and family. 

It’s never healthy to totally isolate yourself. It’s important to keep in mind that going ghost shouldn’t be an entirely solo mission. There should always be at least one or two people in the loop with you on what you’ve got going on.

It might feel tempting to isolate yourself from the world during a breakup, but that would be a huge mistake. Spending a day or two per week around other people will help you on your healing journey in more ways than you realize. 

If you can’t stomach the idea of talking to people about your breakup (or anything else), you can ensure that you’re getting a bit of human interaction by spending an hour at your local coffee shop using the free Wi-Fi and sipping on an iced latte. 

Taking a stroll through your favorite store will allow you to exchange a few words with the sales associates and customer service workers. 

Human interaction, even on a minuscule level, is a must. 

Going ghost from your ex and/or going ghost from social media can be great. But finding yourself in total isolation along the way is not the way to go.

There is so much power in going ghost. However you decide to do it, stick to your guns – even if it takes a few drastic measures.