Middle born children often grow up feeling forgotten and neglected. As a middle child, I resonate.

Historically, Black women are overwhelmingly disregarded and treated as insignificant members of society. As a Black woman, I resonate.

Writers stay hidden from the world, tucked away behind screens where we go largely unnoticed beyond whatever words we publish. As a professional writer, I get that too.

TikTok was the first and only place where someone like me could feel seen – Seen.

The harsh reality of the TikTok ban

For the first time in my existence, posting on TikTok led me to believe my message had value — which was empowering for someone who spent the majority of her life feeling less than valuable.

For further context, my best video on TikTok pulled in nearly 10 million impressions.

And for a second there (with the help of TikTok), I didn’t feel like I was such an insignificant speck in the universe.

The loss of TikTok goes beyond something immature, stupid, or meaningless like plenty of people are callously arguing.

The app allowed Americans to escape the matrix of 40-hour work weeks by giving folks the chance to earn livable incomes without being controlled.

It allowed small businesses to promote products and services in their local areas.

It allowed anyone struggling to make ends meet with their full-time job to pursue a side hustle that salvaged their finances.

It served as an informative search engine regarding which beaches to visit, which colleges to enroll in, which sustainable brands to purchase from, which movies to watch, which books to read, and beyond.

You could search for advice about how to save money on budget travel, how to walk away from a toxic relationship, which red flags to look out for at car dealerships, how to shed weight before your wedding day, and more.

Using TikTok meant getting flooded with thousands of videos from real people sharing thoughtful advice – almost like you were on a FaceTime call getting insight from a friend.

And it made people like me feel seen for the first time in our lives.

In contrast, apps like Instagram, Facebook, and Twitter have been overrun by aggressively right-wing propaganda.

It appears there’s no solid place to turn for social media usage anymore.

This matters because social media is how millennials and Gen-Zers have stayed connected over the past decade. Gen-Xers and Boomers have also joined on certain platforms.

So, what’s next with the loss of TikTok as our new reality?

The brutal truth is that the community we collectively built on TikTok cannot be replicated anywhere else.

One major example? The shared experience between millions of users who post the same exact videos on TikTok and Instagram, of course.

In my own personal experience, one of my videos would pull in hundreds of views, likes, and comments on TikTok… then I’d post the same exact video on Instagram, where it would only pull in maybe 10 or 11 likes in total. Cringe.

TikTok was the app where people supported each other with love and mutual respect. It’s where we made each other feel seen.

Instagram is a toxic platform where people spy on your life by creeping on your posts without liking or supporting anything.

TikTok is fueled by love, friendship, and support. Instagram is fueled by judgmental haters who double as monitoring spirits.

Millennials (like myself) are incredibly tired of being disappointed, but we are doing our best to remain hopeful anyway.

Here’s to hoping TikTok will make a miraculous return someday without becoming some toxic version of Instagram that bubbles with right-wing propaganda and negative energy.